I sort of feel like this poor sap right now. I’m trying to waterski but can’t get up. I also refuse to let go of the rope, so the boat keeps dragging me. I’m not letting go even though I know there is no way from this position to pop up on my skis. So I will just enjoy the oxygen-less ride under a foot of water a little longer until the boat driver cuts the engine.
I finished my 30th session of radiation today! That was originally my full dosage but about half way through treatment when they determined my cancer was not acting right they increased me to 33. Only. Three. More.
You’ll notice that my skin is very dark around my mouth and cheeks. It’s like that all the way down my neck and to my clavicle too. The radiation essentially sunburns you on both the outside and inside of any area it is shot at.
This past week I was left with only a very scratchy, whispery voice. It hurts to talk so I did very little of it this week except for one night when I met with friends that I made in Puerto Rico that were in town.
The mouth sores are everywhere so I typically have a mouth full of pebble ice that helps numb and cool an otherwise painful region. The throat has been too sore to swallow anything other than water / melted ice and even that now has become a challenge. I’m on several different pain meds that help quite a bit, but each come with various levels of side effects that render me pretty useless outside of my recliner.
The weight has stayed pretty consistent now for the past week between 163 and 166. The feeding tube isn’t helping me put on weight but has definitely helped me stabilize.
Lastly, while I can’t eat or drink I still crave lots of things. I made list of all the stuff I will plan to eat when my mouth is in shape. Ice cold anything sounds good all the time! Even just the smells of certain things have been really “appetizing” so a few times this week I’ve cracked open a vanilla root beer and just smelled it over the course of an hour.
So I’m basically in survival mode. A few more days. Get through it. Doesn’t have to be pretty. Find ways to help the time pass quickly.
Thank you fsir the continued prayers, notes of encouragement, etc that always seem to brighten my day. We got this. Home stretch.